It's a mental illness, not a body type.

Hello :)
In this post I want to address a slightly more serious issue then that of my previous posts, something that affects me every single day at the moment and millions of others like me around the world and that is a very large stereotype that surrounds the illness of anorexia.

Imagine this. I put two people in front of you. One is a size 0, you can see their rib cage and their hips poke out and they have a thigh gap. The other is a size 20 with stomach rolls etc. and I ask you to tell me which one you think suffers from anorexia. Most people are likely to pick the person who is size 0 with great confidence, because of the stereotype that surrounds this illness.

People tend to view anorexia as a body type i.e. hips poking out, thigh gap, rib cage on show etc. when in fact this is not only very wrong but extremely dangerous. Anorexia is a mental illness, meaning it stems from the mind, which means that no matter what size a person is they can still have anorexia. Someone who weighs over 500lbs can be anorexic and on the flip side just because someone is very skinny, doesn't necessarily mean they have or ever has had anorexia.

As previously said this stereotype is a very dangerous one, as many people who suffer from this illness who don't fit into this stereotype don't have their illness taken as seriously and therefore don't get the care or attention they need and so their illness progresses until eventually they do resemble this awful and life threatening body shape.

Source

This idea that anorexia is body type needs to be banished and fast. It is not possible to be too 'fat' to have an eating disorder. Every case of anorexia should be taken with equal seriousness no matter what the size of the sufferer.

Thank you for reading
and remember it's a mental illness not a body type
B x

'If flowers can bloom after Winter passes, then so can you'

Hello :)
*warning this blog post may be one big ramble of nonsense*

The title of this blog post comes from probably my favourite quote at the moment, (I'm a bit of a quote whore so I switch which ones my favourite a lot but this one is definitely number one).
This quote can be applied to so many situations like most quotes can, the 'Winter' this quote refers to can mean so many different things to different people, it could be a down patch in someone's life due to grades, a death of a loved one etc.

To add a personal note to this post I'd thought I should explain what this quote means to me and why it's so special...
I have suffered with a lot of mental health problems throughout my life, last year (2013) I suffered from deep depression, self harm and suicidal thoughts and I got put into therapy for a long time, but recovered.
But most recently and I guess why this quote is so special to me right now is that I have been diagnosed with anorexia and I'm trying to recover and like all those who face recovery and I have good days where I feel motivated and positive but more bad days where I don't see myself as strong enough to get better....and this is where the quote comes in.
It reminds me that all things get better, no matter how long Winter is I will always get better at the end of it and I just need to keep going and teach myself to be better, because in reality no one else can do it for me.

And so do you, if you're facing trouble, be it something like me or someone close has died or you just feel sad, things get better, they always get better, you just need to stay strong and teach yourself how to be happy again by simply doing the things you love and stopping the things you don't, because if flowers can bloom after a snowstorm then so can you

Thank you for reading
B x

Sundays.

Hello :)
I think I am one of the very few teenaged girls that simply love Sundays....
I don't why my love for Sundays is so great, maybe it's the peacefulness that comes with the day, it's like the world is letting out a sigh of relief from the hard week and kicking off their shoes and sitting back waiting for the new week ahead.

Anyway my day hasn't been like the usual unproductive Sundays that I normally endeavour in. Yesterday I invested in a pair of bright pink (and I mean bright) Nike free run trainers which I found strange because I'm currently not allowed to exercise until my weight is up and my eating is better *rolls eyes*. HOWEVER this rule seemed to changed today when I was granted permission to play tennis for an hour with my other half and I haven't had fun like it in a while.
Since my eating problems have been getting worse and worse my views on life have done the same and I have been all round miserable and honestly at time damn right horrific to be around. But tennis today has lifted my mood and I'm clutching onto this sporting high for as long as possible.

Okay so I grant you me playing tennis on a Sunday isn't the most riveting of things to read, but hey isn't this what blogging is about? Besides I guess I just wanted to capture this day of overall happiness.

Thank you for reading
B x

*oh I also decided I want to start writing a book, nothing serious just leisure I guess*

Food on my thoughts.

Hello:)

So for a good few months now food and the prospect of eating has...well taken over my life. 

I cannot pick up a food and eat it without a long process of thoughts of how many calories are in this piece of food and if it will make me fat from eating it and so I have my foods that I know are safe and well I don't eat anything but those foods. 

I used to be able to eat whatever I wanted, no guilt. Now I can barely pick up a piece of fruit without feeling guilty after it and quite frankly it's shit. 

I'm stuck in a never ending circle of wanting to eat pizza and cake like every other human being my age but not wanting to be fat and feel like a failure. 

As sad as it may make my life seem the feeling of hunger and refusing pizza or cake etc. actually gives me a sense of achievement....saying that (well typing it) actually highlights how sad that is and how bad this situation has gotten 

Sure I get the "just eat more" thing a lot but people don't really understand how impossible that is for me and for a lot of other people I guess as well. 

I ate 700-800 calories a day....that's half of what I should do I have no energy for anything even to feel happy and I am fully aware of all the health risks and how that is for me and how it will slow down my metabolism and only make things worse...but I cannot help it, it's a constant mental battle for me. 

I am sorry if you've come across this post and it's made you sad but I guess I needed to let my inner brain contents out onto a page 

If you have any advice then that would be really appreciated because honestly my life is just a misery right now 

I am not officially diagnosed with any eating disorder if anyone was wondering,

Thank you for reading if you did.

B x

Photo credit weheartit.com

Making Acquaintances

Hello :)
There are minimal things to say about me I just wanted to introduce myself to anyone who was wondering around the internet and happened to come across this blog.

I am of the awkward age of 17, the in-between stage of still being a teenager and becoming an adult and I am a girl....if you were wondering. 

I enjoy documenting my thoughts on things and writing and so I figured I should start writing on a blog whether anyone reads it or not is down to everyone else but I guess it will be a therapeutic (and safe way) of getting out the contents of my brain onto a page
I can't specifically tell you what this blog will be centred around because no ones life is centred around one soul thing and I can't tell you how often posts will go up either because I'm not sure when I will fancy writing

If you're still here then thank you for reading this I do appreciate it and perhaps I will see you again sometime :)

(Photo credit from weheartit.com)